To Dave-finity and beyond!!!
posted by Jimbo at Friday, January 20, 2006
Yes. These events are all true. The tales of one man and his doghouse. Email me if you have any Dave quotes or pictures worthy of putting up at jumpingjimbo@hotmail.com
1 Comments:
Hello
My name is Lee, a simple name for a simple fellow. So simple that I knew nothing of men like David Slaughter or his wordly works, until one sunny afternoon, 14th July 2003.
I was walking, a method of transport I use frequently, and upon my journey I decided to phone my mother and ask if we could have a chicken. Upon removing my mobile telephone, I noticed that I had no signal. With a flood of anger that could only be caused by a lack of signal, or David Blunkett, I decided to try and repair my phone.
BIG MISTAKE!
Little did I know that my actions could have led to my untimely demise. Thankfully a man more noble then a knight, more handsome then a lava lamp and more smooth then a greased up black man emerged from the local cantonese restuarant.
I remember little of what he said as I drank in the beauty of this man, save that had I attempted to repair the P.I.M.P chip in my phone, it would have transformed into an Islamic extremeist and blown off my face. How close I came to the end!
With the reflexes of a rabbit (not an albino! It's worth noting that albino rabbits are very slow and probably stupid), my saviour took my phone, viewed it on all sides and then spoke sweet nothings into it.
SUCCESS!
Not only was my phone repaired, and doped up on signal. But it now had a Gary Coleman ringtone as well. Only then did I realise what a great guy this man was. If I had homosexuality, I probably would have asked him out. Most probably to Adventure Island, or maybe for a taco.
Anyway, I don't so I didn't.
As quickly as he came, the man had left leaving me with a feeling close to nausea, but with a purpose!
My life changed that day as I dedicated myself to finding and thanking the dashing streak of man bacon.
So now, I say this. Thank you David Slaughter.
10:46 AM
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